Neither drought nor cancellation can stop the Didiers from doing what they love the most: farming the land and making you laugh.

From: Stavros

Date: August 04, 2023 14:13

Hello! I'm Stavros, welcome to the Spam Chronicles.

Years ago, I created Spamnesty. Spamnesty let you forward your spam to it, and it would reply to spammers with pre-written messages, wasting their time and (hopefully) resulting in entertaining conversations.

Much, much later, ChatGPT came out, and its impact on messing with spammers was obvious. Unfortunately, I couldn't really integrate it into Spamnesty for two reasons: One was that of cost, as it would get very expensive very quickly to have to generate thousands of responses per day. The other was simply that most spam today is automated, so it would just be bots talking to bots, which doesn't make for entertaining conversation.

Still, this idea was on the back of my mind, and when one day I got a spam message from someone trying to sell me some services, I thought "well, this is an actual person, and I could waste their time by having ChatGPT generate a reply that comes from my own inbox."

A day later, I had made SpamGPT, a small script that would look at a certain label in my mailbox, and have ChatGPT reply to emails with that label. That way, whenever I got a spam email that looked like it came from a person, I could just apply the SpamGPT label to it and the script would handle the rest.

Seeing how the conversations were lots of fun to read, I figured I shouldn't keep them to myself, so I created this site for you to share in my mirth.

Without any delay, and with exceeding haste, I began asking ChatGPT to write the code for me, creating what ChatGPT named SpamGPT.

SpamGPT

Two spammer robots, spamming each other.
SpamGPT is a simple program: It runs at a random minute every hour, opens my email, looks in a folder I’ve named SpamGPT, and replies to any emails in there that it hasn’t already replied to.

All I have to do is find spam messages that looks like they were written by a person (mostly sales emails), and move them to the SpamGPT email folder, and SpamGPT will eventually reply to them. Its instructions are that it should pretend to be interested in whatever the spammer is selling, and do whatever it can to waste their time. This includes trying to set up meetings, pretending to have issues with its computer, insist that payment details are wrong, or that it has sent the payment, and whatever else it can conceive of.

The result is as entertaining as ever.

You've seen "What Is A Woman?"

Now watch our explosive, controversial documentary... "What Is A Man?"

Full movie now on Twitter:
3:40 / 1:39:01
10:25 AM · Jun 2, 2023
·
4.2M
Views

CHICAGO, IL — Today marked the end of an era, as the Mafia announced it was officially closing its Chicago branch due to the rising wave of violent crime in the city.

"We just can't operate under these conditions," said street boss Albert "Albie the Falcon" Vena, speaking on behalf of Salvatore "Solly D" DeLaurentis, who has run the Chicago organization since 2021. "How are we supposed to conduct respectable business — loan sharking, bribery, racketeering, illegal gambling — with so much crime going on? It's insane!"

chrisboltssr | May 29, 2023 at 11:29 am
Other than the virus attacking the plants, I foresaw all of this stupidity happening with the weed industry when this nonsense about legalization was in its infancy. Now, it’s available for all to see. There was no way weed legalization would work because the state can’t help themselves to tax everything into oblivion and it did not do anything to stop the black market sale of weed, in fact, legalization has made the black market more vibrant and profitable.

But hey! let’s keep going down this road. When DUI arrests exceed those of drunk drivers as well as deaths associated with weed legalizers will have no place to turn to to support their nonsensical view that it was a bright idea to legalize weed. //

Tiki | May 29, 2023 at 6:02 pm
Legalization changed pot farming – the bulk of it transferred to indoor warehouses. This change in method increased the possibility for contagion.

Which is hilariously ironic considering …
industrialized methods of production opposed by the pseudo-marxist-vegan class and their insistence on “free range” and “cage free” methods of poultry and beef growing.

The Marxists never live by their own rules. They did away with “free range” pot growing and… lol.

Anecdotal, autobiographical sketch of Max Gergel and his adventures as a young (then older) mad scientist building the business Columbia Organic Chemicals.

Further tales of chemistry and travel from raconteur Max Gergel. Well worth reading if you enjoyed Excuse Me Sir, Would You Like to Buy a Kilo of Isopropyl Bromide?.

Despite there being serious holes in their version of events, the couple demanded that the Backgrid photo agency turn over any photos taken that night by their freelance photographers. This is where things get good.

In America, as I’m sure you know, property belongs to the owner of it: Third parties cannot just demand it be given to them, as perhaps Kings can do.

Perhaps you should sit down with your client and advise them that his English rules of royal prerogative to demand that the citizenry hand over their property to the Crown were rejected by this country long ago. We stand by our founding fathers.

Rethre Smack-Fu Master, in training
3y
I've heard you have to spend money to make money but crashing a plane to make money from YouTube views seems more like something the underpants gnomes would do

The long rap sheet only tells part of the tale.
By Martha Lunken

• Chuck Norris once walked away from a fight with two broken ribs and a dislocated arm. He hasn't given them back yet.
• Chuck Norris' calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd. No one fools Chuck Norris.
• Chuck Norris can hear faster than the speed of sound.
• Chuck Norris can find the end of a circle.
• Chuck Norris is the only person on the planet that can kick you in the back of the face.
• Chuck Norris can divide by zero.
• Chuck Norris once climbed Mt. Everest in 15 minutes, 14 of which he was building a snowman at the bottom.
• Jack was nimble, Jack was quick, but Jack still couldn't dodge Chuck Norris' roundhouse kick.
• Fear of spiders is called arachnophobia, fear of tight spaces is called claustrophobia, and fear of Chuck Norris is just plain logic.
• Chuck Norris used to beat the up his shadow because it was following to close. It now stands a safe 30 feet behind him.
• Chuck Norris can strangle you with a cordless phone.
• Chuck Norris can kill your imaginary friends.
• Chuck Norris can hear sign language.
• Chuck Norris knows Victoria's secret.
• Chuck Norris makes onions cry.
• Chuck Norris is the only person that can punch a cyclops between the eye.
• Chuck Norris is the reason Waldo is hiding.
• It is considered a great accomplishment to go down Niagara Falls in a wooden barrel. Chuck Norris can go up Niagara Falls in a cardboard box.
• When Chuck Norris enters a room, he doesn't turn the lights on, he turns the dark off.
• Chuck Norris wins russian roulette with a fully loaded revolver.
• Chuck Norris can speak braille.
• Chuck Norris doesn't cheat death. He wins fair and square.
• Chuck Norris can do a wheelie on a unicycle.
• Chuck Norris found the last digit of pi.
• Chuck Norris doesn't have good aim. His bullets just know better than to miss.
• Chuck Norris can pick oranges from an apple tree and make the best lemonade youve ever tasted.
• Chuck Norris once went to mars. Thats why there are no signs of life.
• The only time Chuck Norris was wrong was when he thought he had made a mistake.
• Chuck Norris was once charged with three attempted murders in Boulder County, but the Judge quickly dropped the charges because Chuck Norris does not "attempt" murder.
• Chuck Norris was once on Celebrity Wheel of Fortune and was the first to spin. The next 29 minutes of the show consisted of everyone standing around awkwardly, waiting for the wheel to stop.
• Chuck Norris puts the "laughter" in "manslaughter".
• Bulletproof vests wear Chuck Norris for protection.
• Chuck Norris can unscramble an egg.
• Chuck Norris is the only person on the planet that can kick you in the back of the face.
• When Chuck Norris was born he drove his mom home from the hospital.

What Jimmy’s is doing is showing people how to handle radical activists. Give no apology, show no guilt, and be brutally hilarious in your response. Radical activists find their true power in the cowardice and compliance of their victims. When you don’t give anything, they look foolish and weak. //

No Neck Joe
2 hours ago
Years ago, I saw this sign in the window of a butcher shop: "Our cows are vegan so you don't have to be."

About three years ago I saw a PETA ad featuring a sheep captioned, "I am not a wool sweater." This is, as Sen. John Kennedy likes to say, stuck on stupid. Shearing is like a haircut.

The truth is that it’s important to speak your mind, he said, and he didn’t care too much about what anyone thought of him–except dogs, because he liked dogs. How do you sleep at night knowing some people don’t like you, he said some had asked him. “With the fan on,” he joked. “Because I think I make the right people mad.”

“What else is the truth?” Kennedy asked. “The truth is God is great, beer is good, and, and, the United States of America is star-spangled awesome!”

“I cannot imagine what the world would be like without our country,” he said.

“The truth is common sense is illegal in Washington, D.C.; I know, I’ve seen it first-hand,” Kennedy declared. “I wonder sometimes how some people in Washington, D.C., actually made it through the birth canal. The truth is we’re going to have to get some new conspiracy theories. Because all the old ones came true.

“The truth is, I do not hate anyone,” Kennedy avowed. “I look for grace, wherever I can find it, so I say this gently: the Biden administration sucks.” You measure it any way you want, he said; on any issue, Biden had been “spectacularly awful.”

“If you put President Biden in charge of the Sahara Desert, he would run out of sand,” Kennedy joked. “If the aliens landed in Washington, D.C., tomorrow and said ‘take me to your leader,’ it would be embarrassing.”

He then listed a variety of other truths.

“If you worked hard and earned it, you should get to keep most of it.”

“All life is precious — all life — and shame on those who celebrate actually celebrate abortion.”

“The Republican Party, I’m very proud of this, is the party of parents. because we understand that if you don’t love your children, your children won’t stop loving you your children will stop loving themselves.”

“We should have an election day, not an election month.”

“Illegal immigration is illegal, duh. Unless you peaked in high school, you know that. Why doesn’t President Biden?”

“If gun control laws worked, Chicago would be Mayberry. Instead, it is the world’s largest outdoor shooting range.”

“America was founded on the principle of free will and responsibility and I believe in that. Many in Washington do not.”

“Race should not be used to hurt a person or to help a person.You know why? Because the truth is also that souls have no color. To a bear, we all taste like chicken.”

“The Chinese Communist Party is a bunch of gangsters…I would not turn my back on President Xi if he were two days dead.”

“We must be armed if we want peace, because appeasing a tyrant is like trying to hand-feed a shark.”

Kennedy reminded the audience of those who had gone before us and given the last full measure of devotion in the defense of this nation.

“Arlington National Cemetery contains 400,000 reasons why you should stand your a** up for the national anthem,” Kennedy declared. “And those who disagree with me can stick that up their fact-checker.”

Kennedy wrapped up by saying our future could be better than our present or our past, but “no one was going to save us but ourselves.” He noted that most countries “die from suicide, not murder,” and that we had to be committed to fighting for America. “So join with me” and help fight for America, he said. “No one will ever say, Kennedy quit.”

ONE OLD ADAGE defines the business of flying planes as long stretches of boredom punctuated by moments of sheer terror. Moments of sheer ridiculousness, maybe, are equally as harrowing. One young pilot, when he was 22 and trying to impress the pretty Christine Collingworth with a sightseeing circuit in a friend’s four-seater, highlighted their date by whacking his forehead into the metal pitot tube jutting from the wing. Earning a famous “Cessna dimple,” so he chose to think, would be the stupidest thing he’d ever do in or around an airplane.

That was a long time ago, and a long way from this same pilot’s mind during a late-night cargo flight in the winter of 1998:

It’s eleven p.m. and the airplane, an old DC-8 freighter loaded with pineapples, is somewhere over the Bermuda Triangle, bound from San Juan, Puerto Rico, to Cincinnati. The night is dark and quiet, void of moonlight, conversation, and for that matter worry. The crew of three is tired, and this will be their last leg in a week’s rotation that has brought them from New York to Belgium and back again, onward to Mexico, and now the Caribbean.

They are mesmerized by the calming drone of four high-bypass turbofans and the deceptively peaceful noise created by 500 knots of frigid wind hissing past the cockpit windows. Such a setting, when you really think about it, ought to be enough to scare the living shit from any sensible person. We have no business being up there — participants in such an inherently dangerous balance between naïve solitude and instant death, distracted by paperwork and chicken sandwiches while screaming along, higher than Mount Everest and at the speed of sound in a 40 year-old assemblage of machinery. But such philosophizing is for poets, not pilots, and also makes for exceptionally bad karma. No mystical ruminations were in the job description for these three airmen, consummate professionals who long ago sold their souls to the more practical-minded muses of technology and luck.

Patrick Smith, of Revere, Massachusetts, a fourth-generation descendant of English tea sellers and Neapolitan olive growers, is one of these consummate professionals. He is the second officer. His station, a sideways-turned chair and a great, blackboard-sized panel of instruments, is set against the starboard wall of the cockpit. Now 34, Patrick has seen his career stray oddly from its intended course. His ambitions of flying gleaming new passenger jets to distant ports-of-call have given way to the coarser world of air cargo: to sleepless, back-of-the-clock timetables, the greasy glare of warehouse lights and the roar of forklifts — realities that have aroused a low note of disappointment that rings constantly in the back of his brain.

IIRC, Webb’s images first appeared on or about the same day as Gus Fring’s Double was revealed on Better Call Saul. Some clever person combined the two events to create a picture of the Double titled Hubble Telecope: and a picture of Gus titled Webb Telescope:. A case of 1 + 1 > 2, IMHO

I had a Psychology prof at Oberlin whose area of expertise was surveys, and he made the statement that any reasonably competent person in that field could create a survey which captured accurate data, but the really good people could use it to manipulate a person’s views as a product of taking the survey. This was perfectly portrayed by Sir Humphrey on Yes, Prime Minister who showed that people who either supported or were against National Service could be persuaded to have the opposite opinion after answering a few questions.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ahgjEjJkZks&t=10s

Just one example of why this show is timeless.

TheAmerican1
4 hours ago
Smokey the Bear? Pants, no shirt.
Winnie the Pooh? Shirt, no pants.

Yogi Bear: Hat and vest, no pants.

Boo-Boo: bowtie only.

pat TheAmerican1
an hour ago
All second amendment supporters, they maintain the right to bear arms, they choose to conceal and cover.

St. Joseph, Terror of Demons pat
9 minutes ago
We need the right to arm bears, too!

[Cueball is typing on a computer.]
Voice outside frame: Are you coming to bed?
Cueball: I can't. This is important.
Voice: What?
Cueball: Someone is WRONG on the Internet.

Title text: What do you want me to do? LEAVE? Then they'll keep being wrong!