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- When Alexander Graham Bell invented the telephone he had three missed calls from Chuck Norris.
- Chuck Norris went skydiving and his parachute failed to open, so he took it back the next day for a refund.
- Chuck Norris has a grizzly bear carpet in his room — the bear isn’t dead it is just afraid to move.
- Chuck Norris counted to infinity. Twice.
- There has never been a hurricane named Chuck because it would have destroyed everything.
- The Great Wall of China was originally created to keep Chuck Norris out. It didn’t work.
- Chuck built the hospital he was born in.
- Chuck was once bitten by a cobra, and after five days of intense pain, the cobra died.
- Chuck Norris has a diary. It’s called the Guiness Book of World Records.
- Chuck is the only person who can actually kill time.
- When Chuck looks in a mirror, even his reflection is scared to look him in the eye.
- Chuck once killed fifty men with one grenade, and five seconds later, the grenade exploded.
- Chuck can hit 11 out of 10 targets, using 9 bullets.
