Skeptical Techie
2 hours ago
You forgot the offside rule (sorry Law). Its seeming purpose is to perplex all experienced and very skilled sandlot players, fans, novices (who rarely understand it was called and have absolutely zero idea why play stopped with the ball given to the formerly defensive team {"side" in soccer ~football in football parlance~ parlance), and the referees themselves. Virtually nobody understands this rule except for some coaches (some each of rec, select and pro). All (except the refs) get upset and yell incoherently for most of the calls.

And soccer (so called only in the USA, Canada and sort-of in Japan, almost everybody else calls it football, fut, foot or some variant, the Italians call it il calcio, the kick) has its own language with various dialects based on native language and who knows what else.

Kick Off: First Touch

Side Line: Touch Line
Goal Line: Goal Line <== But nobody learning the sport can believe it is actually called that.
Team: Side
Uniform: Kit
How many referees: Really super hard to tell. It keeps changing. (not a definition but...).

Rule: Law
Rules: Laws of the Game
Game: Match
Field: Pitch

Positions: Aside from Goalkeeper/goalie/keeper and forward, the rest are more guidelines than anything really instructive as to what they do.
Fan: Fan
Violent Fan: Hooligan

MVP: Man of the Match <== Never heard "Woman of the Match" declared at a women's match...
Big Box near goal: Technical Area (but for a game with seemingly so many inscrutable rules why is this area THE technical area and not everything within the boundary lines (d4mn1t, within the touch and goal lines).

Small Box near goal: Goal Box (seems too simple and easy).

My favorite rule[law]: The offside rule. It's application (enforcement) has three (3) exceptions which really boil down to only one exception, whenever the ball has gone outside the "field of play" (yes it is a "pitch", but never mind that). So the three exceptions are on a throw-in, a corner kick and (the usually forgotten exception) a goal kick (when the goalie/keeper is given the ball to kick, with a single touch only, back into play from within their goal box). Of course in each instance, the ball had just been sent out of "the field of play" and is being brought back in to restart play. So why not just say that? Nobody knows, except maybe it would make it more understandable to players, coaches, refs and fans alike.

There is one (ONE) term that soccer/football aficionados get right and is simply put:

"Own goal". Yes, this is the easiest one to figure out. Some simp just scored on his/her "own goal". Not safety, not touch back (and what is the difference anyway?). Just "own goal". And, guess who is the first player out of the soccer park that day (skip the showers, I'm outta here). Only weeks later are the beers on the own goal fool..