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Like most Black men, I received “The Talk” from my parents about “Driving While Black” after earning my driver’s license at 16. The Talk included not driving around with a bunch of other [Black] boys so I wouldn’t draw too much attention from a police officer.
The Talk also included what to do if I was ever pulled over by a police officer. They told me to keep my hands in plain sight and on the steering wheel and to make no sudden movements. If it was nighttime when I was pulled over, they suggested I turn the dome light on so the officer could see everything going on inside my vehicle.
I was to answer politely with “yes sir” and “no sir” to all of the officer’s questions. And no matter how unjustified I felt the encounter was, I was never to argue or become sarcastic with the officer. I said a few paragraphs earlier that “encounters” was the operative word in this piece.
When I was young and foolish in my late teens and twenties, I had a lead foot that netted me many speeding tickets. I would forget about the court dates and, of course, a warrant would be issued for my arrest for non-appearance. I’ve had countless numbers of these warrants, and each and every time, one of my parents would come and bail me out of jail — usually in the middle of the night!
On one of these encounters, my father said something to me that changed my perspective and motivated me to become more responsible. He said he worried about me getting all these bench warrants — and that one day, I was going to encounter a police officer who was having a bad day, or worse, who was a racist.
He was worried that I was going to say something sarcastic and the police officer was going to beat the hell out of me and claim I was resisting arrest. Or worse, I was going to be accidentally shot after making a sudden move or reaching for something on my person or in my vehicle. He told me point-blank: “You need to stop having all these encounters with the police before something bad happens to you.” Those words resonated with me that night and I changed my driving habits.
I decided from that day forward I was going to become more responsible and limit my encounters with the police as much as I can. Sadly, in most of these shootings, the victims initiated the encounter with the police and they escalated the encounter when they resisted arrest.
I am in no way suggesting that police should be judge, juror, and executioner while doing their dangerous jobs. But resisting arrest, no matter the justification, is usually not going to end well for the offender.
I said earlier that I received “The Talk” from my parents when I earned my driver’s license in the early ’80s. Millions of my peers received that same talk. I think I can speak for most of us and say that it is UNIMAGINABLE for us to have ever considered resisting arrest. My parents never had to include that in “The Talk.”